You Too Will Rest

by Careful Gaze

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about

Eliminate bigotry

Eliminate unnecessary labels

Your hatred won't be tolerated

credits

released May 10, 2019

Music written by Gabe Reasoner, Preston West, Aslan Denbow, and Jason Neymeyer.

Lyrics written by Gabe Reasoner.

Recorded December 2018 - January 2019, Engineered by Samuel Howell - Sunken City Records - Minneapolis, MN.

Mixed by Roger Camero at Bright Lights - Santa Ana, CA.

Mastered by Paul Miner at Buzzbomb Studios - Orange, CA.

Artwork by Gabriel Avram (@galaxigabriel) - Rome, Italy

Careful Gaze is:

Gabe Reasoner - Vocals / Bass / Synth

Preston West - Guitar / Vocals

Aslan Denbow - Guitar / Bass

Jason Neymeyer - Drums

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Careful Gaze Minnesota

Post-hardcore/heavy indie from MPLS.

You Too Will Rest is out everywhere.

your hatred won't be tolerated

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Track Name: Highways, Sideways
Okay

Depressed and listening to Arcade Fire, in my car at One in the morning
There’s a scary amount of things to lose - even more to be created
I’ve spent a lot of my life laying on floors, trying to get a handle on everything
Haven’t figured out a way to do that yet, I promise I’m always trying

I’ll be honest with you, I don’t like myself very much right now
I’ll be honest with you, I don’t like myself very much right now
I let a piece of myself die so the rest of me could live
Sometimes you have to say goodbye to the parts of you that you cannot forgive
I’ll be honest with you, I don’t like myself very much right now
I’ll be honest with you, I don’t like myself very much right now
I need rest
I let a piece of myself die so the rest of me could live
The last time I considered suicide was driving from Mount Vernon at One AM

This feeling of emptiness has been my driver for far too long
I’m better than the places that it’s taking me

If I can’t reclaim my driver’s seat
I will walk myself towards home until my legs buckle beneath me

You can pick me up if you choose to do so
I will rest in the ruin of my frail creation
Depressed and listening to Arcade Fire, in my car at Two in the morning
Track Name: Burning Treehouse 2k
Our country has been reduced to the smoking barrel of a gun
Pressed against the head of everything we do not understand
Hatred and famine put us in these dark waters
And we can't crawl out unless we drop our weapons

Let's stay up late my brothers, let's stay up late my sisters
We couldn't win our battles, but we're moving on and limping home
Let's lock our arms my brothers, let's lock our arms my sisters
They will break our bones before they will break us apart

They will erase us for kneeling in the national anthem
They will erase us because we ask too many questions
They have warred against tyrants for taking away the free will of the public
And tell me - how is this any different?

There's an ever-growing trail of pipelines and rifles and locker room talk

And not a single person can tell me when it's going to stop

Let's stay up late my brothers, let's stay up late my sisters
We couldn't win our battles, but we're moving on and limping home
Let's lock our arms my brothers, let's lock our arms my sisters
They will break our bones before they will break us apart

We turn to fire
When hope doesn't have soil in which to thrive
If shelter can't learn to protect what's inside
Does that shelter deserve to survive?

Let's stay up late my brothers, let's stay up late my sisters
We couldn't win our battles, but we're moving on and limping home
Let's lock our arms my brothers, let's lock our arms my sisters
They will break our bones before they will break us apart
Track Name: Upstaged
I need to be destroyed
Rearrange the pieces of me if you find something worth salvaging
You know the part about glue holding me together

I've been writing a lot of songs for myself, and I can’t be sorry for that
I needed them
They have always told me my songs are sad, and I can’t be sorry for that
I needed them
If my heart loses control of the pen then I won’t ever write a song again

This one is to tell you how much it means that you have not abandoned me
Even when your skin is so uncomfortable you wish you could remove it

I just played all the sad songs to a mostly empty room
I’m sitting on a throne of doubt, and what makes sense is: you
What makes sense is: you

Like the last note of a ballad in an empty hall
Your voice hangs in the malleable air as my pulse begins to slow
Check my pupils, in the low light, cradling my skull
My soul and body are concussed and you’re the only cure I know

There is adhesive on every wall, but we are making ourselves a home

I need to be destroyed
Track Name: Yourself, or Others
You were so confusing when you started singing
To the songs we promised we would never love
But with speakers crackling from the music blasting
Our souls lifted to an elevated sense of euphoria
We could never stay this immortal

So off we go
I'll take my meds when I get home
Until that moment I will soar through wild unknown
First world depression
Will soon give way to first world aggression
And when that war breaks out you'll find me all alone
Distracted by this broken song

My song

And you were so beautiful when we began to roll
You were ethereal when your body was thrown
I had to tell all my friends, so I kept on running
Cause I couldn’t keep the voice in my head waiting
You won’t forgive me for my lapse in judgment

So off we go
I'll take my meds when I get home
Until that moment I will soar through wild unknown
First world depression
Will soon give way to first world aggression
And when that war breaks out you'll find me all alone
Distracted by your broken bones

Your bones

Alright - you're laying in a burning field with glass in your face and a song in your head
I'm at the top of a parking garage staring at the ground wishing I was dead
Did a god create us this way - am I a captor of these feelings
Are we all one circumstance away from becoming that which haunts us
Damn it

You won't forgive me in my final moments
So off we go
I'll take my meds when I get home
Until that moment I will soar through wild unknown
First world aggression
Can't cover up this pain I'm feeling
And when that war breaks out you'll find me all alone
Distracted by a broken soul

My soul
Track Name: Rainbows
The day you were born was the best day of your life
From there, you learned to smile through pain and say “it’s a good day,” even if that meant you were lying
You’ve been lying every day for a long time
You've been painting your possessions a deeper shade of blue
Because that's what your mother and your father asked of you

Well they don't like rainbows, do they
They don't like rainbows, do they
And they don't like snowflakes, either
Give them a snowstorm, darling

You asked your mother what those words meant to her
She never said them, but you knew she meant them
She didn’t have tell you, you’re her liability
You heard her telling her work friends
You tried to be the boy she wished that you were
You cut your hair for her, you burnt that dress for her
You painted every wall the deepest shade of blue
They covered up the rainbow but they still couldn’t hide you

Well they don't like rainbows, do they
They don't like rainbows, do they
And they don't like snowflakes, either
Give them a snowstorm darling
Give them a snowstorm

Understand you have a place on this earth
That is something you can’t afford to forget
Understand you will encounter people
Trying to blame someone else for their own self hatred
You were conditioned to hate yourself
Based on the opinion of everyone else - rethink

You are not a label or a liability
You are a ray across the sky, don’t forget your strength
Rethink
Track Name: Sinking Vessel 2k
How many of you are there, portside
How many of my brothers, outside
I said I'd give them shelter, I tried
You said that you would leave us - you liar

How many of you are there, portside
How many former brothers, outside
I promised to stay up late, I tried
I woke to rising water and fire

Pure fire
You've ruined all our shelters
You’ve burned down our treehouses
Our vessel’s going under

Give me 15 minutes of activism, if there's any hope left I'm losing it
Give me 15 minutes of activism, everything is gone now - isn't it
Give me 15 minutes of activism, nothing I can say will save this ship
Give me 15 minutes of activism, everything outside has gone to shit

How many of you are there portside
How many former brothers outside
You've ruined all our shelters

You've ruined all our shelters, the places you helped foster
They're smoldering and going under and no one on this boat treads water
Murderer - look what you’ve done
How many of you are there, portside
Track Name: Hate Coffin
Gaslighter, gaslighter
You speak the like the vultures that you travel with
Ignorant harbinger
Feeding on the pain of the softer spoken
Profiler, profiler
You speak like your heart will never stop beating
Vicarious murderer
Everybody's hearts stop beating
Everybody's hearts stop beating
(Gaslighter)
Some hearts will stop beating sooner

This glass floor won’t hold out forever
Just a few more kicks until it shatters
When your privileged life is taken from you
Your gravestone will read "blue lives matter"

Get up, walk out
Educated guess - you're quivering behind your blindness
Move on, forget
You are not a child - you’re too old to be acting like this

Let’s go - your hatred won’t be tolerated
Leave behind your hateful mindset
Or I can guarantee no one holds their breath
When you are buried with your own ignorance
You will be buried with your own ignorance

Your hatred won’t be tolerated
Track Name: Glue
I'm putting together a broken church puzzle from the 90s and I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss you
It's missing pieces, kind of like my theology and I wish I could jump inside and speak right to you
I'd say “hey Jesus, I'm hopeless as hell and I know nothing but I am not one of the men that's going to kill you
Why will your followers someday hate the ones you die for, will their buildings make you wish you'd never come here”

No amount of glue can fix something that’s missing pieces
No amount of glue can fix this

I can't help but realize as I put the scene together, why they always make you look the way you do
Caucasian Jesus is making the privileged white folks money every Sunday, in every basket, in every pew
They love this culture and as for everyone outside it, it is either a mission or a distraction
I haven't found a verse yet where you killed for the sake of country, or where you picketed a local female clinic

No amount of glue can fix something that is missing pieces, no amount of glue can fix this
Break my neck with your praying hands
I will rearrange and reapply the best that I can, no amount of glue can fix this
Break me into a better man
Break this, just break this

I don't believe you’re who the Internet says you are
I don't believe you are who the Megachurch says you are
I don't believe you are who our President says you are
If you are who they say you are, then oh Lord - break my neck with your praying hands
Break it, just break it

No amount of glue can fix something that is missing pieces, no amount of glue can fix this
Break my neck with your praying hands
I will rearrange and reapply the best that I can, no amount of glue can fix this
Break my into a better man
Break this, just break this
No amount of glue
Track Name: Vacant Chair
You are the wick of a candle, finally burning out and resting in wax pools
Your daydreams consist of chandeliers, hanging from the ceiling in your school
You are convinced that no one will care that your seat's vacant, or bother to ask "why"
You will be two missed calls and an apologetic voicemail on the day you die
Your father doesn't call you on your birthday because you stopped making him proud
There's something about your mental diagnosis that made him stop reaching out
This rope is made of woven words that hurt you, and leave you in a haze
The gallows are the loved ones that have told you "this is just a phase”
As your lungs deplete of oxygen you will tell yourself “this is a mistake”
You will beg the ones that care for you to hold you up and take the rope away

listen-

This is your community. No communion or holy words spoken through cracked lips can stop your family's weeping if you do this.
You are like water spilled from our hands - dribbling a little at a time into the crevices in which your mother planted all of your favorite flowers.
You were dying, just like those perennials, and every night of self harm was a petal dropping down, quiet upon impact but resounding with a warning almost no one could understand.
Suicide is a language for which there is no translation - forgive us and give us patience as we fumble through sentences with you, grasping for clarity.
You mother will grasp for it for years if her greatest creation destroys itself. She will sit in your bedroom and search memories for times she could've seen those petals falling.
There are parts of you spilled out across the world already. Do not spill your soul onto these walls, because there are millions of better times and places for expiration than this.
Tell us what you need. We are clasping our fingers together in an effort to retain what is left of you. We will sit for hours and talk of solutions or sit silent with you in a room, pondering the weight of simply being ALIVE.
You will consider this as a final expression for as long as you exist - but just because you learned a new word doesn't mean you have to use it. We will invent new languages together without blood or dissension. It will take years be fully established.
Do not let your place go vacant. Do not let that heart go silent. There is a single petal that hasn't fallen yet, and we will be damned if it is not the most vibrant.

Is it too late for me to get help
I want out of this

It's not too late for me to get help
I'll get out of this

Take the rope away
Track Name: Passive Pencil Drawings
I need to tell you something, I'm not as sad as I used to be
Depression holes up in my lungs some days but
I've been exhaling it into the fresh midwinter breeze
You have to to dig to find purpose, I am breaking that ground anywhere I can
If I exhaust all my resources you will find me alone, silent and buried in sand

Some days I will be this quiet and
Others will not understand it

If you aren't willing to change
The most you will achieve is comfort and mediocrity
When I watched someone I love lose consciousness for the last time
I understood why that wasn't enough for me

It wasn’t enough for me

I want to show you something, it’s a feeling that my words cannot explain
It’s the blunt force trauma to my heart when
I hear the phrase "you give and take away"
You have to fight to earn progress, so I will push back on the doors that have kept me out
If I get to the gatekeeper and he won't let me in, does that mean I haven’t earned my doubt?

There is no way to rationalize
Having to see this much loss of life

If you aren't willing to change
The most you will achieve is comfort and mediocrity
When I watched someone I love lose consciousness for the last time
I understood why that wasn't enough for me
Where my heart lies hasn't changed
But who it lies with seems to dwindle with every year

When daily actions decide rest or torment
I understand why you've edited the god you fear

We've all edited the god we fear

When we sat with her in silent rooms
I never knew how much those moments meant
I read a book and took her for granted
Never noticing each time she slipped
When father said we wouldn't visit much longer
I never knew exactly what he meant
Our beliefs were based on loved ones dying
Why was I surprised that this felt different
I was in the room when she shut her eyes
I made a sketch of a demon slayer
I escaped in passive pencil drawings
While they issued her an afterlife prayer

I hoped she'd live to see me find my real love
It was clear she didn't want to wait
I escaped in passive pencil drawings while she passed through eternity's gates
Track Name: Failing Body 2k
I woke on an island, shed tears for my family
You woke on an island with blood on your hands
No judgment or hatred regarding appearance
We shed our old clothes and we danced on the land
We explored for the morning, I talked about futures
We mourned over people we harmed in the past
We stumbled on wreckage from my former vessel
Lying in pieces splintered in the sand

And this is just how you wanted it
This is just how you wanted it

You grew weak on the island, collapsed in some flowers
With a look in your eyes I had not seen before
The look said “I've lived so sure of where I was going
At the end I'm afraid I don't know any more”
You apologized and those words hit like a bullet
You said “I know we were different but I loved you regardless
And all of the reasons that we battled each other
Will be buried on the island - and they're not coming with us”

And this is just how we wanted it
Let’s stay up late my brothers,
That is just how we wanted it
Let’s stay up late my sisters

You died on the island with me right beside you
I built you a raft and pushed you from the shore
I sent God a message - if they send back your body
When they're done with your soul, I will tend to your form
I built a new treehouse with wreckage from old ones
My brothers and sisters awake in these walls
Your body came back so I buried you with them
My loved ones and enemies - all stripped of their labels

And this is just how I wanted it
Let’s stay up late, my brothers
This is just how I wanted it
Let’s stay up late, my sisters
How many of you are there
This is just how I wanted it
How many of you were there
This is just how I wanted it
This is just how I wanted it

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