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When I Leave

by Careful Gaze

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1.
When I Leave 05:07
My baby knows when I’m depressed She puts her lips against my neck I look into those sunsoaked eyes as she says to me “we are headed for our deaths” Soothsayers swear we’re near the end They nail their doctrine through my shins They say “we know the things to which you turn to get warm when those winter months roll in” We are always just a few more days away from the hurt boiling over The children see when something’s wrong They are taught to shout “it won’t be long” And if they make it to the point of being free, they’ll spend their whole lives moving on When this world becomes too heavy we just pass it on to younger shoulders Bunk beds, for my sister that isn’t here Deathbed’s calling louder every year You said - you don't need to fear the storm I said - that still leaves a lot to fear My baby knows when I’m depressed She puts the blade against my neck She says "there's something in your eyes that looks so empty, like you've been waiting for our deaths" My father gives me to the ground His lips tremble but make no sound He builds a shrine for me from gemstones that cannot save me, and I will haunt this fucking town I was waiting on the road for you to come along and run me over My baby knows when I'm depressed Those children know when I'm depressed My father knows when I'm depressed My body knows

about

This song is a concept / story that is accompanied by a short novel. It is the first installment in a series in which one entry will be released per year. You receive both the song file and the digital book when you purchase this on bandcamp. Physical books are also available, as well as a more simple ebook on Kindle.

When I Leave tells the story of Arbor, a young adult living in a dark and corrupt small town where people live to blend in and forget. In the midst of preparing to leave this town, Arbor uncovers a crime ring with disturbing roots that has been silently controlling their town. Arbor finally faces the chance to make a difference in their life and the lives of others, but has to make a choice that may end with being buried - before they ever get the chance to leave.

This is a story about love, loss, bravery, depression, and how they affect the people around you.

credits

released August 14, 2020

Artwork and book design by Trevor Skarie
Produced, mixed, and mastered by Sam Howell / Sunken City Studio
Stream video by B Drake
Careful Gaze is Gabe, Preston, and Aslan.

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Careful Gaze Minneapolis, Minnesota

MINNEAPOLIS BASED HEAVY, SAD, AND PRETTY

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